Being Point

Tag: happiness

  • Does Less Ambition Make You Happier – But Also Less Useful?

    Ambition, as we have seen this week, can be a mixed blessing. Edison said poignantly, “If I had not had so much ambition and not tried so many things, I probably would have been happier, but less useful.”

    Is that the tradeoff: Give up happiness for being useful? Do you think Edison’s ambition was for being useful or for fame, fortune, accomplishment itself, or for the challenge of inventing things to solve problems?

    Is your ambition useful or counter-productive? Has ambition ever gotten in the way of your happiness? Again, don’t limit your thinking about ambition to power, money or the like.

    As with all things, ask yourself the question: “How does this quality (of ambition) both serve and mis-serve me? The winning approach is balancing out those answers to something that works well for you.

  • “My One Regret In Life Is That I Am Not Someone Else.” ~ Woody Allen

    We humans have often beaten ourselves up based on comparisons that we make of ourselves with others. Comparison, skillfully used, can be highly beneficial. Yet, if unskillfully used, comparison causes enormous self-inflicted pain.

    Woody Allen said, “My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.”

    Have you ever thought that someone else was inherently better than you? More “deserving” of love and happiness? Can you see that beating yourself up, because you had established a set of rules that judged you harshly as compared to someone else, has been needless suffering?

    How about cutting yourself a break and giving up beating yourself up once and for all? You can declare it a behavior that no longer works for you. As situations arise that could degenerate into beating yourself up, you can choose differently. What do you have to lose?

  • Ending “Pre-Emptive Strikes” Against Ourselves

    There was a very bright woman in my high school French class in senior year who, each time we had a test, would announce dramatically that she was going to fail. Inevitably, she would get an “A,” and usually the best grade in the class. She taught me about what I call “pre-emptive strikes” – attacking ourselves before someone else can.

    Most of us have beaten ourselves up pre-emptively. Consider behaviors like apologizing in advance, being “sorry” for delivering bad news that we had no part in creating, or calling ourselves names or using self-deprecating language about our abilities and accomplishments.

    What would happen if you cultivated a life where attacking of all kinds was unnecessary? Can you imagine a life without the hierarchy of someone’s being “right” which required someone else to be “wrong”? Often, we’ve beaten ourselves up to avoid what we have feared would be even worse treatment at the hands of another.

    The more you lose the perception that you have to be beaten up for some imagined purpose – for example, to “fit in,” to “please,” to “appease” – the happier your life will be. Punishment is unnecessary for emotional issues. Experiment with leading your life with expanding compassion and self-love.

    What is your level of commitment to ending the old habits of beating yourself up, especially with “pre-emptive strikes”?

  • Can Money Be Part of a Happy Life?

    It’s been a fascinating week discussing our relationship to MONEY. All week, we’ve acknowledged that money doesn’t buy happiness. Today, a little different approach: We’ll conclude today considering how Greenbacks can be part of a happy life.

    Colonel Sanders said, “There’s no reason to be the richest man in the cemetery.”

    There can be tremendous joy in being part of a marriage, partnership, family, business, team . . . a combination of people that you love and enjoy and who meaningful to you . . . and working to create prosperity together.

    It can be fun to be able to provide for loved ones, to make a difference with charitable contributions, to create adventures in life, to invest well for financial security, and to use money to learn. There are all kinds of ways to use money productively . . . since we can’t take it with us!

    What have been your favorite uses of money? Has it ever truly been part of enhancing your joy? How can you expand your relationship to money beyond feelings like stress and guilt to include ease and even fun?

    Copyright 2009. E. B. Hutt Bush and Coaching for Results, Inc.

  • Money Makes the World Go ‘Round?

    There’s a line in “Cabaret”: “Money makes the world go ’round.” This is a prevalent . . . and potentially troublesome . . . belief.

    Is it possible that we have it wrong in our culture when we act as though money can buy happiness?

    Have love and money ever intersected in your life? I heard someone say recently, “I married her for her money,” and I was sad that anyone would ever do that. Has that ever happened to anyone you know . . . or even to you?

    Richard Friedman said, “Money will buy you a fine dog, but only love will make it wag its tail.”

    Have you seen or experienced evidence of money influencing affairs of the heart? What do you believe is the best attitude toward money within a romantic relationship?

    Copyright 2009. E. B. Hutt Bush and Coaching for Results, Inc.

  • Money Is Simply a Medium of Exchange

    This week, we’re discussing the role and impact of money in our lives.
    Benjamin Franklin said, “Money never made a man happy yet, nor will it. The more a man has, the more he wants. Instead of filling a vacuum, it makes one.”

    Money is obviously required to provide at least the basics in life. And in the current economic climate, money occupies a central place in the news and in our thoughts.

    Money is a medium of exchange . . . a common denominator that allows us to trade our time and resources for those of others.

    What is your healthiest relationship to money?

    Who are your primary examples of how to deal with money? Neighbors, parents, employers, the media? What did they teach you? Have you ever used money to assess your own value as a human being or the value of another?

    How can we be prosperous and create abundant money. . . and, at the same time, have money have an appropriate place in our lives?

    Copyright 2009. E. B. Hutt Bush and Coaching for Results, Inc.