Tag: suffering

  • Command And Control Work Cultures Are Problematic In Business

    One of my longtime clients changed jobs recently where she is confronted with a new boss who is autocratic, aloof, and completely focused on being the boss no matter what. There’s no room for intelligent conversation to discuss the merits of situations – just, “I am the boss and that’s the way it is.” Sadly, those decisions are often not well-reasoned, and they seem capricious and even aggressive.

    This kind of command and control attitude creates huge and unnecessary suffering in organizations – and, frankly, in relationships of any kind. Work, by definition, is collaborative. Even if you work for yourself – by yourself – you are interfacing with people who buy what you produce or make.

    Command and control cultures emulate the military model where decisions are made by seniors officers, and those in the lower ranks are given their orders. Given that we live in a democracy outside of work, there is inherent conflict within organizations that are more command and control than collaborative. Younger generations of employees, especially, find working in command and control environments difficult.

    How would you rate your work environment / culture? Is it command and control, collaborative, or a hybrid of the two? Do you have any idea why it is the way it is – that is, what models were followed in creating it? What do you think of command and control? Do you have personal experience with it?

  • How Has Perfection Affected Your Life?

    This week’s topic – perfection – has caused much suffering among so many people because it has been interpreted to be the only acceptable way to be – even though being perfect is a completely unrealistic goal.

    Most likely, what we are really talking about when we speak about perfection is a high degree of excellence or mastery in a particular activity where “perfect scores” are attainable. Neither of those terms is absolute, yet “perfection” connotes the ultimate ideal – the best there is or ever could be.

    In the rational light of day, perhaps nothing is perfect . . . with the exception of love if it is unadulterated and unconditional and pure.

    How have you been affected by visions of perfection? Have you felt pressured by family, friends, peers and / or our culture to be without flaw? Even though you might have questioned the true ability of anyone to be perfect, how have the messages about perfection affected your self-image your self-assessment, and your assessment of others? Is there a rational alternative to our cultural addiction to perfection?

  • The Suffering of Others and Equanimity

    Witnessing bad things happen to people has been very hard to bear. People experience health issues, financial distress, emotional pain, relationship problems and a myriad of events ranging from merely bad to downright tragic. How do we deal with seeing that?

    It has felt easier for me to live in equanimity about my own life difficulties than to have equanimity about others’ sorrows. Why? Because I want to help; I want to do something with and for them to change things and make it better.

    Life recently presented me with a situation where I witnessed someone else experiencing great loss . . . and, try as I might, there is nothing that I can do about it, and I was unable to simply let it be.

    Have you ever had the experience of being present to the pain and suffering of another . . . and be unable to help? How well have you been able to live in equanimity? Is it easier for you to have equanimity about your own situations or those of others?

    Copyright 2009. E. B. Hutt Bush and Coaching for Results, Inc.