Being Point

Tag: support

  • Transformation In Professional Situations

    Transformation is often not much fun in the moment. Consider the necessity of changing a professional situation that isn’t working. You might have been giving and giving – to the point of imbalance – in a business or client relationship. The giving wasn’t reciprocated, and after you’ve tried all kinds of ways to change it, you have to take decisive action.

    The others involved may resist – they may even attack you because you’ve changed what you’re willing to do and be.

    Gail Sheehy says, “Transformation also means looking for ways to stop pushing yourself so hard professionally or inviting so much stress.”

    Have you had the experience of needing to pull back from stress and imbalance as a means of transforming a business dynamic? What have been the consequences? Did you experience support or resistance from the others involved? What did you learn about getting yourself into that situation and how it could potentially be avoided in the future?

  • Reduce Overwhelm With A Supportive Listener

    Probably the best way to address overwhelm is to have a talk with a friendly and supportive person in your life. Ideally, there is no judgment, no criticism and no attitude from that person – just supportive listening and, if you’re lucky, some useful feedback.

    It’s amazing what enormous value there is in talking things through. I firmly believe that we humans think better together. Speaking aloud under the right circumstances allows the emotions to usefully come to the surface – and the fears and concerns can be exposed to light and air where, sometimes, some of those worries evaporate.

    Explore worst case and best case with that person. Discuss how you can diminish the chances of worst case and expand the chances of best case. Can you think of a recent example of your being supported by discussing something that felt overwhelming, and then someone graciously allowed you to think aloud with them? Were you willing to release some of your overwhelm after that conversation? Who can you talk to in this productive way?

  • Disclose Your Goals To Others With Care And Wisdom

    Among the frequent questions about goal setting is the degree to which it’s best to reveal your goals to others. Likely, all of us have had the experience of telling someone else a goal and having that other person squash it in some way, including:

    * Telling us that we can’t do it

    * Reminding us when we’ve not met the goal yet, and not in a kind way

    * Making fun of us for trying

    * Not believing in us, but rather in our failing

    Disclose wisely because the survival and ultimate accomplishment of your goal may depend on it. Get the agreement of those to whom you disclose that they will only support you and never engage in any of the behaviors above. The support of others can be determinative.

    Bottom line: it’s your goal and you are the only one who, by definition, can ultimately be responsible for it. It’s not a terrible idea to hold your goals closely and disclose on a “need to know” basis at first and then slowly reveal as success toward the goal is had.

    What has been an approach that best works for you? Is it best for you to disclose your goals? When and to whom? Is there someone whom you can always count on to support you and believe in you?